Monday, 13 July 2009


It that time of year again. The time when the lazy media outlets, fed by big kids with over-active imaginations bring out the old "Lets go to Mars!" idea.

Here's a few reasons why I wouldn't go to Mars.

1. There's no air, and I kind of like breathing.
2. There's no water, and probably no beer.
3. It takes about 4 years to get there, which is slightly longer than it takes to get to Mildura.
4. Dull nightlife (but considerably better than Mildura's).
5. It gets down to -140 degrees celcius, which is slightly colder than Melbourne at the moment.
6. They have a volcano 27 km high. Fuck that.

It does have a few things going for it however.
- A year goes for 683 days, so I would wouldn't age so quickly (though I'd only get half as many birthday presents).
- They have a volcano 27 kilometres high. That would be awesome.
- The sky is pink and the sunsets are blue (seriously), so I'd save a lot of money on psychotropic drugs.
- We've pretty well stuffed this planet, so I guess we'll need a new one to trash sooner or later.



At 13 July 2009 at 13:12 , Blogger Kath Lockett said...

You had me at Mildura!


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