There is an idea within Einstein's General Theory of Relativity that if an object travels in a straight line through space for a ridiculously large amount of time, that object will eventually arrive at it's initial point of departure. Of course this all depends on the answer to the great question, is the universe open-ended or curved?
As far the bloggiverse is concerned, I am living proof that it is of the curved variety.
I have arrived at my initial point of departure...... again.
You see being the Man at the Pub makes one prone to making rash, emotional decisions whilst in varying degrees of inebriation, and early this year (or late last year) I awoke one afternoon behind the neighbours compost bin with a whopping headache to find my beer had been stolen from the fridge and my blog had disappeared. The whole lot gone.
In an effort to re-invigorate I constructed my next blog, Red in Tooth and Claw
, a cutting edge expose into the Janus faced, naked ape, delving deep into the dark recesses of the mind of the third Chimpanzee and it's view of the world around it. I even changed my name to Homo J. Sapien to herald the occasion. It lasted about two weeks, but it did have a nice picture of a Mandrill in the background. You see my intellectualism is like a Japanese meal.... lots of it, in very small portions.......... and an innordinate fondness for sea cucumbers.
A sea cucumber, yesterday.
After a blogless period I tuned my creative meanderings to It's not you, its me!
, a tottering, rollercoaster of a blog, about an overweight, middleclass, white male and his problems. While not the most original of blog ideas, it satisfied for a while. And in an act of foolhardy short-sightedness, I started another blog, to revive my flagging painting career, Blank Canvas
, an artists journal. But they didn't fire, and I didn't love
them, so I caught up for a few drinks with my old mate the delete button.
My bloglife had died in the arse. I drifted through time and space, like in that fantasy movie but without all the cool special effects and beings from other dimesions. I was a failed blogger. A flogger. I needed to redeem my online self. My creativity failed to spark in other departments, like oil painting, photography, playing guitar and model aeroplanes, but the sex was great.
Then one day I got the itch, and it wasn't that fungal thing this time. I needed a new blog. I busily set about the concept of it and then the design and tone. Small World
, a grownup's blog. A blog about fascinating places, unusual facts in history and the natural world, of general interest but best used with Google Earth. I embraced my inner geek and knocked up a you beaut header. I would be factual and objective in my posts. It would be a non-political blog suitable for every person from every culture, children and old people, if they knew what a blog was.
But I soon realised the error in my thinking. How could I be perfectly neutral and objective? How could I not crack a joke at someone else's expense? How could I not upset half the world's population when I innocently mention that I think Captain Cook was a top bloke for his time, despite all the colonization and brutal opression that followed him.
Captain James Cook. Man before his time, or utter bastard?
Then I got an email from a lady from west, a reader of the original The Man at the Pub
. She reported on the a dire threat to the security of the local blog scene...... rampant complacency. She also said my old blog was good, so that was enough to have me don my cape, put my undies on the outside of my pants, scrap Small World
and ressurrect The Man at the Pub
, like a phoenix from the ashes who has just realized his DVD's are 3 weeks overdue. So here I stand, ready to add my own unique form of complacency to the local blog scene.
I have my old mouth back. Yay!
Labels: Blogging, Me