Thursday, 20 August 2009

...you have the power!!!!!

I assume everyone's got one. One of those friends/acquaintances who send you the most god-awful powerpoint presentations or chain emails that are written very badly in sickly coloured large type in a terribly ugly font with far too much exclamation that say things like...

DREAM TO LIVE!
YOU HAVE THE POWER WITHIN YOU TO MAKE MAGIC HAPPEN!!!!!


THE UNIVERSE LOVES YOU!!!


(Usually followed by...)
SEND THIS EMAIL TO 30 OF YOUR FRIENDS. THIS IS VERY IMPORTANT!!! IF YOU DO NOT, THE DREAM WILL DIE... BLAH, BLAH, BLAH...

...that is meant to be profound but just sounds like it was written by some drug-addled hippy lurking in the back of a crystal shop, or an extremely untalented English language student who just figured out how to use email.

Next time someone sends me one of these I'm gonna send then an email that says...

BUGGER ORFF AND DIE!
YOU ARE A COMPLETE TOOL YET MAY HAVE THE POWER WITHIN YOU TO STOP ANNOYING INNOCENT PEOPLE!!!!!


THE UNIVERSE LOVES YOU, BUT I THINK YOU'RE A TWAT!!!


(followed by...)
DO NOT SEND THIS EMAIL TO ANY OF YOUR FRIENDS. THIS IS VERY IMPORTANT!!! IF YOU DO, YOUR MARGINAL POPULARITY WILL DRASTICALLY WANE...

Then I'll attach a nasty virus.

That'll larn 'em.

6 Comments:

At 20 August 2009 at 09:19 , Blogger the projectivist said...

hmmmm... unfortunately it's not a friend who sends me those stupid powerpoint emails, it's the regional manager and they're full of motivational-speak.

if it had been a friend, i'd have happily told him/her to stop sending that bollocks, but as it's my superior i'm obliged to read the damn things!

 
At 20 August 2009 at 10:02 , Blogger Baino said...

Oh God you're right there's always one or two. I've pissed them both off by asking them not to send such drivel. The other ones that get hit with the delete button are all the cartoonish menopause and sisterhood ones FTS!

 
At 20 August 2009 at 10:55 , Blogger elaine said...

Mine's my mum. *sigh*.

In other news! I thought this might be about having a superpower. Mine is knowing where things are. Do you have one?

 
At 20 August 2009 at 14:37 , Blogger The Man at the Pub said...

I feel your pain, Ms Projectivist lady.

Good on ya Baino! Sock it to em I reckon.

Elaine - Yes my mother-in-law is guilty of this too (but I'm too scared to tell her what I honestly think).

Superpowers hey? I guess farting is not something to aspire to, so I'd have to say my superpower is being able to tell the correct time without looking at a watch.

 
At 20 August 2009 at 18:27 , Blogger Helen said...

I have two people who send me those awful awful things. I've reached a point where I don't even open them anymore - if it's from them and has an attachment or fwd:FWD:FW:fwd:FW in the subject line, it goes straight to the junk folder!

 
At 20 August 2009 at 18:29 , Blogger Lorna Lilo said...

I delete them. I have no friends.

 

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